Sunday, April 13, 2008

On Friday mornings for the past month, I have been dropping Brady off at our Early Intervention childcare center at 9 a.m. to his Developmental Therapist Julie, and then picking him up at 11 a.m. He's had Circle Time, Snack, played outside with other friends, and done arts and crafts. He did his first project there, a big green shamrock with paint and glitter. This is a great program for him and a great sample of what's to come next October when he turns three and starts preschool.

He's had some good days, some bad days. We're getting to the more frequent bad days.

In the past, Julie has reported to me that he seems to get upset and startle with the kids. She was thinking the very bright hospital-like room and the other kids bothered him. I didn't buy it - Brady's been in lots of situations where there is a lot of kids and he is fine; in fact, he is very interested in watching them. My house is hardly a quiet one. I bring him to the store with me because he loves watching people and looking up at the lights. But there was definitely something not right, and I do believe Julie is a good therapist so I was ready to listen. We talked about starting up the brushing again to help in this sensory overload. I also made a note to make sure he had eaten a good breakfast since one time he was definitely hungry.

Brady's PT was at the school with him on Friday as Julie was out. When I came in to pick Brady up, I saw him sitting on Lisa's lap, head buried in her chest, almost asleep, with red cheeks. Not a good sign. She saw me walk in and said immediately, "OK, we need to have Tara (his OT) come and observe him, because he is definitely having sensory issues." As soon as I had left two hours earlier, he cried for awhile, then was fine, did great feeding himself, then when they went outside he freaked out, almost a panic attack, as Lisa described. I have NEVER seen him have any sort of anxiety issues, nor had my mother or Tom. Lisa acknowledged there was a new kid at school that day who cried off and on and that set Brady off. I know he is very sensitive to other kids crying, he gets upset for them. (What a sweetheart! :) )

Lisa said they are going to make some changes in the room, turn off one of the fluorescent lights, make a quiet reading area for the kids which will be Brady's quiet area too. But the biggest revelation was what Lisa thinks might set him off in the beginning: he misses me! She said a few times when I have gone to work and left him with her for PT at home with my mother, Brady has cried lately. And --duh!-- it is very common for 2-1/2 year olds to have separation anxiety from their parents -- WS or typical. We're always thinking about the WS factor in things, we forget about the regular stuff! I said Brady goes to others very easily, but Lisa pointed out I am usually there. Even though he has known Lisa almost his whole life, I am not there.

I never went through that with Michael. Michael was and is a very social kid, asking store clerks where to find things and asking other kids n the playground to play. At his first day of preschool it was "Bye, Mom!" I suppose if he was a little sad to see me go, I might have thought of that with Brady. It's nice to know Brady likes me!

I am hoping we will be able to soothe Brady and keep the playgroup and enjoyable experience for him. (Although it is nice to know that the consensus is he really likes me :) )


Every minute counts.... said...

Glad to hear he misses you. That is one of the things I do love to have a "problem" with. :) Makes you feel like you do something right for him to miss you so much.


Amy said...

Just when uyou think you have it all under control, BAM, he throws you a curve ball! Good luck sorting this out.

Julie said...

Lexi was my only one who had trouble with seperation and I don't envy you. It is so stressful. She still is quite the homebody, and it is really nice. The other 3 basically want me to get lost. I think Noah still misses me when I am gone though. At least that is what I tell myself.

TracyH. said...

Who wouldn't miss you!
I miss you and I live down the street!lol

Laura said...

Oh my goodness, those are the BEST pictures.
He's keeping you on your toes for sure!!!

Melissa said...

Brady has the most special mom. Oh course he would miss you. I LOVE the pics. I am going to have to get a copy. :) Love you guys! The other Kiernans in Sharon....

Heather said...

Gosh, can I say how beautiful your boy is with that smile! and without of course, but I haven't seen a picture of him with a smile until now! I love it.
and hey, I vividly remember the feeling of not knowing if Caleb really liked me or not. I never got any reaction when leaving or coming back. It was a terrible feeling. I am so glad that Brady is showing that to you now. It is gratifying. :) Makes all the tough stuff totally worth it! Please keep the playgroup. It is so good for him, and you. xoxo, Heather

Lebenland said...

Hi Kerry,

Love all the pics. of your adorable little boy! I wanted to be the first to post a Happy B-day on the 17th on your blog! I hope you have a wonderful day! Find a few minutes to do something special for yourself.

Love, Michelle

Michelle said...

what cute pics of Brady! That separation anxiety can be so hard sometimes! It is a milestone though, but it sure is hard on a mommy's heart! Hope it gets better for him!

Aspen said...

Oh I know exactly what you are going through. Daven has good and bad days as well in his "Mother's Day Out" program that we do. And he absolutely has melt downs when another child is crying. We have learned to stall dropping him off until the others have settled a little. (because they all do seem to have a little separation anxiety during the first 10 minutes) So we take him about 10 or 15 minutes later. That has seemed to help a bit.

Thinking about you. LOVE YOU ALL!

Anonymous said...

Hey Kerry! I just stopped by to wish you a happy birthday! :) Always nine days younger than you, ha ha...

But I also wanted to say that although I don't comment a lot, I always love your posts. And the photos here are fantastic! He is so beautiful -- he looks like he just has the best personality ever. You are a hero every day... You inspire me.

My little boy is ten years old today!

Love to you all,
cousin Jen

Nancy said...

Oh, KERRY! These are the best photos yet.

I went through hell getting Erik to enjoy school but it was his hearing plus anxiety. He would just collapse and lie motionless, and it really scared me.

I love that little man. I really do.