I have been trying to figure out how to write about something that's been on my mind without it sounding cheesy or sad or obsessive. I have spoken to a few people about it, which has elicited blog entries, long conversations and pseudo-therapy sessions. Yes, we're talking about Brady not smiling yet.
It's silly, really. Why am I so obsessed??? I am grateful he is here in this world; I am grateful how well he is doing in general. It's like complaining about your husband not cleaning up after himself to your friend who is divorced from an abusive man. She's probably thinking, "Um, at least you're happy in your marriage." I KNOW things could be worse... yet, still here I am, thinking about it.
It's really because that's a SIGN... a sign he's happy, that he cares, that he's aware, so to speak. That he likes me! LOL It's a glimmer of hope from a year of doctor visits, and weight checks, and constantly working on things that come naturally to every other baby. It's the thought that, "yeah, well get through all this and manage."
I was able to write about this today because Brady's speech pathologist came this morning. She was very happy that his attention on a face lasted for over 20 seconds... she said this was the beginning. Smiles come from mimicking, as well as other sounds and facial gestures. If he is focusing now on faces, the smile is not too far behind. What a weight off my shoulders! Just knowing it may happen at some point with concrete evidence is enough to make me relax and go back to just enjoying this adorable little creature.